we had a pretty gutsy last weekend of summer. i mean, having two kids and going anywhere is pretty much the biggest feat there is outside of child birth. and can i just say, this whole concept of being superwoman at child birth doesn't AT ALL compete with how gigantic my cape is when i am alone with both kids, around 5pm - making dinner amidst feeding a toddler, bouncing and tending to a newborn, and then cleaning up after dinner and bathing said toddler. the 5-7pm window is pretty much crazy town around these parts. and i've never wanted to shout GO ME any louder than the first (and maybe only) time i've done it. holy balls, that's some work right there. and really - what in the h did i have to "complain" about with one. if i could slap myself back in time i would.

perspective is a good thing. damn. gina.

ok, back to our weekend of gutsiness. three words: evergreen state fair. we tag teamed fo sho - ty had wyatt, i had summer and we did the fair. as best we could. with the dumond's - thank the lord. having another family to go with does make you feel like less of a sweaty mess, that's for sure. as if saturday's events weren't brave enough, we decided to take both kids to kirkland to the park.

sounds easy enough.

um. yah. no.

there was no parking.

so we parked up a big ass hill. in front of some rich person's house. i kept imagining them watching us unload as if we were their guests. at one point, i even joked and pretend yelled up to their window that we'd be back in an hour for dinner.

wyatt was in the bob. and thank god the brake on that bad boy worked. because if it didn't our kid would be heading to heaven right about now. think: christmas vacation sled scene.

i sweated my balls off trying to get SJ into her solly baby wrap. she hated it. i hated it too. who in their right mind would enjoy themselves in 80 degrees with a sweaty ball of fire strapped to your chest as you brace yourself in rickity flip flops down a hill made only for someone wearing a helmet and shin/knee/elbow guards?

there were a shit ton of bees. and they loved something about me - my perfume, the striped wrap. god knows, but i am sure i entertained those around me as i swiped the air around me vigorously too many times to count.

i had to nurse SJ there. and the only shaded spot was on a bench right next to the most visited public garbage can. and i had the solly wrap on, and did my best to navigate a swaddle blanket to cover my nip but about 45 seconds in i gave up and said f it. nipple, meet the breeze. and the eyes of a few perverted dudes. after more bee visits, i awkwardly carried my bobble head of a newborn and pushed a top heavy bob stroller up a grassy knoll while ty did his best to chase wyatt around the busy park on the water.

wyatt pooped. and we had no diapers. who in the eff has two kids in diapers and doesn't have one in their diaper bag. so ty had to run, carrying wyatt, back up that giant hill in 80 degrees to change him in the car. the whole time, i waited with SJ as she screamed her full head off as i tried yet again to get her back in the wrap. the girl was not having it.

so just as ty was getting back, we pretty much turned around. and i was that mom carrying her baby while wearing a worthless wrap. ty and i were sweating ridiculous amounts and both kids were in tears as we made our way to the car. i am sure ty wanted to cry too. i sure as hell did.

fun for all.

but the good news is this - we did it. we still got out of the house and took our kids to the dang park. go us.

and we captured a few pics that made the whole event look down right easy too.

my first

there's something about your first baby, and i know that now. of course there is something about your second too - and i'm sure your third, fourth and fifth if you are so lucky (or crazy - whichever you prefer). but my first made me a mama. wyatt has paved the way and shaped me into the person i am today, the mom i always wanted to be. i know this now, more than ever. he brought new meaning to an already pretty amazing life - making it amaze balls, you know, the infinity of amazing. he's my "big kid" now. a big boy. and it really feels like it just happened overnight. maybe because it did. on august 6th, he was the only baby i knew. my little guy. my bambino. my monkey. on august 7th, he was brand new to me again. he was bright eyed, and more ready than i knew to be a big brother. i will never forget that moment where he saw his sister for the first time. the moment that defined our family of four. this meeting made it real. and oh how sweet it was. and it's already been (2 days shy of) 3 weeks, and the excitement he has and the love he shows to summer is just as fresh as it was that first moment. i know that when these two have their tough moments over the years, i'll look back on that first morning where it was us, on the bed. me holding both my littles, while ty took pictures and videos of this time we had imagined for the 10 months prior. i'll remember my heart. and how full it was. how i had never seen that smile on wyatt's face before. and at the same time, i knew mine had never been bigger or more real. i was so proud. i didn't care that i had slept for an hour, or that my whole body ached from awkwardly pushing my girl out in the bath tub only 6 hours before. or how my lady parts felt elephantitis-ish. or that my hair looked like dreads. or that my gut was out - loud and proud. or that i hadn't brushed my teeth for well over 24 hours. none of that mattered because i had my sweet boy, my little lady, and a husband that is a true partner - in every sense of the word.

i've had about 21 days to take this all in, and i feel like i'll need the next 21 years to digest this life we've created. i feel like nothing really reminds you of how fast times goes until you have kids. the change in them every day is this constant reminder to cherish every stage of their life because before you know it, they don't need you (like this) anymore.

i'm a sappy mama tonight, who loves her life and... who hasn't taken her placenta pills. i'm grateful to be here, living and soaking this time in. today was a good day, despite the every two hour wake up calls last night. it's funny how us mamas just learn to rally, isn't it? (i try very hard to not think about the fact that i probably won't get a full night of uninterrupted sleep for most likely another year.)

we're adjusting, and seeing giant strides in our big kid's ability to show love to his sister without literally strangling or suffocating her. which allows me to breath a huge sigh of relief, knowing that what every one keeps telling me has to be true:

it gets better.