This past week Ty and I hit the 11 year mark since our very first date. Eleven years ago, our dates looked a lot different than they do now. Partly because we aren't in our mid-twenty's anymore, but also because Ohana's and Tialou's in Belltown shut their doors. Our dates were 3 or 4 nights out of the week, easy. We'd typically do a low key dinner out on Thursdays, Seattle bar hopping on Friday's and the downtown Kirkland scene on Saturday nights and easily into the wee hours of the morning. We'd drink, eat, drink, dance, and eat again to soak up all of the drinks. Hangovers were few and far between (for the most part), and we'd sleep in long enough to strum up the energy to hit the gym and do it all over again. Sure, there are times I look back on the fun we'd have being fun and fancy free, but I wouldn't call those the good old days. We had our youth, but were relatively broke (probably because of all that our social lives entailed - new outfits, big bar tabs maybe?), and our kidneys weren't our biggest fans. 

It dawned on us that it was September 16th, while we were out to dinner, just us, on a date. Date night for us is not out of the ordinary.  It's something we are super fortunate to get to do almost weekly. It's one of the, if not the reason we're still married. In the early days of our marriage, every night was date night. Our plans evolved into a lot of date nights in when we bought our first house, and we'd do a lot of week night trips to Thai food, sushi, and Mexican when we were too lazy to cook. When we had Wyatt, we took him with us everywhere that first year, and at around 6 months we had our first over night away for our 3 year wedding anniversary thanks to my mom. Ty's mom and my mom were our go to's back then (and still are!). We were your typical first time parents - not super trusting of just anyone watching our obviously very unique son. #sounique When Summer was born just 9 months after Wyatt's first birthday, we'd leave Wyatt behind and Summer was our third wheel. We'd still get out once a month or so, but again, it wasn't until she was about 6 months that we'd leave her back with Wyatt and hit the town. By 'hit the town' I mean we'd go to an early bird dinner within a 10 mile radius of the house. Still, we made it a priority because 'the grammas' made sure we took the time to invest in us. Thank God for them. When I look back on the early days with both Wyatt and Summer, it was hard to leave them at first. Mostly because we over analyzed the routine, and of course thought we were the only two people on the planet that could successfully pull off the bedtime routine. We were wrong. #reallywrong We learned quickly how lucky we were to have people around us that loved our kids. My brother and now sister in law, Rachel were also great sitters for us and I'd take every single one of their offers so I could eat dinner with Ty, without a baby on my boob. I'd take the time to get myself ready for our nights out, just to feel good about myself and in the moment. I may have dressed up black leggings with lip gloss, bronzer and curled hair, and I felt good about myself. It didn't take long before the kids were just as excited as we were, probably more, to leave. We were practically walked to the door before anyone showed up to watch them. We also found that the bedtime routine was quite a bit easier when we weren't home. Imagine that. #littleshits

As time went on, our kids' 21 month age gap shrunk in terms of developmental compatibility. They'd play together, watch movies and entertain each other for longer spans of time with each passing day. We'd found a couple of amazing babysitters that we could count on as well, and now we find ourselves sitting across a table from each other without any distractions, and absolutely zero guilt, 3-4 times a month. Thursday happy hours are a fave, where Ty and I will meet at a local spot at 5 and get home in time for his mom to drop the kids off so we can get them ready and tucked into bed. Those two hours tee up our weekend pretty perfectly. We get another 1 or 2 weekend date nights within the month, and typically find ourselves relatively close to home at a fun restaurant with live acoustic music and really great wine.  

These date nights for us are everything. Our weeks are long with work, commutes, after-work commitments, dinner, and bedtime routines. By the time our kids go to bed, our vocabulary is shot and our ability to hold a decent conversation is poor, at best. There was definitely a time where this had it's toll on us. Especially in the beginning. Our nights B.K. (Before Kids) involved only uninterrupted conversations, dinners out, dog walks, and workouts. We have accepted that our typical night now consist of chilling out. Sometimes we chill out together, sometimes we don't and that works for us. It works because in addition to all of the work and kid related routines we've fallen into, we've created another that's just for us. We're better parents because of this saving grace, when we can dream about the future, reminisce about the past and pretty simply, reconnect over how much we love this life we've created together. When we can pull ourselves up and out of the crazy chaos and realize that in fact, the good old days are right here, and right now.

I'm curious. What is your secret to keeping your marriage a priority? 

Better Beauty Review: My 5 Favorite Safer Products

I know I am not the only product junkie obsessed with beauty blogs and the latest and greatest. When my great friend, Stephanie approached me to tell me about a new journey she'd started, my ears instantly perked up when I heard it involved beauty products. Lord knew, I'd been spending a decent chunk of my discretionary income trying anything that sounded like it would help lighten, brighten, age defy, or firm. I was a VIB at Sephora, and had my favorite counters picked out at Nordies. Last November, my call with Stephanie introduced me to a line I hadn't heard a single thing about, Beautycounter. In reality, it wasn't the beauty product concept that got my attention all together. Stephanie shared with me that she'd made some changes at home, working hard to make safer decisions when it came to the household and wellness products she brought into her house after the sudden passing of her mother to cancer. What did wellness products have to do with the passing of her sweet mama, I thought?

Then she hit me with a pretty important fact. Several ingredients in wellness products are actually linked to hormone disruption, fetal development, and yes, cancer.  I had never even considered that the beauty product and wellness industry was going unregulated in the U.S. I always assumed that if I could buy it in a store with a reputable brand, it had to be safe for me to use at home. Wrong. In fact, the U.S. hasn't passed a law related to safety regulations in this industry since 1938. That's the year the Golden Gate Bridge was built. To date, the U.S. restricts the use of 30 ingredients in the products we can buy here. Need more perspective? The European Union restricts 1400+. Need some good news? Beautycounter, in it's 4 years of life, has developed skin care lines, body care, baby + kids skin care, make up, and hair care avoiding over 1500 questionable ingredients.

And I needed to get my hands on them. Immediately. Not only did I begin purchasing some of these products because I was so impressed with their effectiveness (while being safer to use!), I signed up to be a consultant so I too could share their story. Our story. It's creeping up on a year since I first became introduced and I haven't looked back. I've had the opportunity to try almost everything in their line, and have quickly identified by go to favorites. I love their skin care lines, the kids wash and their hair care. I think I get the most excited to use their make up each day because if I was forced to pick my favorite every day products, I think these would have to be them. 

Dew Skin // Concealer Pen // Matte Bronzer // Color Pinch Cream Blusher // Volumizing Mascara // Lengthening Mascara 

DEW SKIN TINTED MOISTURIZER

Oh how I love thee, let me count the ways. First and foremost, it has an SPF in it which is a must when it comes to a tinted moisturizer for me. What I love most about the Dew Skin is that it allows my natural skin to show with just the right amount of coverage. As I age, I notice that the whole 'less is more' concept really does come into play when it comes to makeup. I don't have problem skin and I don't need a lot of coverage, so I should be using a product that compliments me in that way, which helps me look younger in the end. (Don't worry, if you do like a fuller coverage for whatever reason, their Tint Skin product is also amazing. It's a medium coverage initially, but is very build-able so you can make it into a fuller coverage if you apply it to the areas that might need a little more love.) I use shade No. 3 now, but given it's turning to fall will start using No. 2 pretty soon.  

TOUCHUP SKIN CONCEALER PEN

Concealer is the most important step in my daily makeup routing. I am a horrible sleeper, and frequently dehydrated and my poor eyes tend to take the hit for that. I started trying a lot of different products for under the eyes, and this is the only one I've used in a very long time that doesn't leave my under eyes dry and cakey looking. It has a color corrector in it as well so it quickly, with very little product, erases any redness or darkness. I use the shade Light. 

COLOR CONTOUR MATTE BRONZER 

I've used my fair share of bronzers over the years and I can't say enough good thinks about this. I use shade No. 1, and it's perfectly matte for every day use and super natural looking. It has amazing staying power, and I love that it gives me just the right amount of color to draw out what color I might already have (with a fake tan!) or give me just the boost I need as my tan fades. 

COLOR PINCH CREAM BLUSHER IN HIBISCUS

To this day, I am still shocked at how much I love this product. I've been a NARS Orgasm blush loyalist for about 10 years, so I wasn't easily convinced to buy this. Not until I saw my closest friends rocking it. I was sold. It's just the prettiest shade of pink, providing such a natural awake look to my skin. These days, being awake and looking awake are two very different things. This is a must. Another super fun way to use this guy is to use it as a lip stick. On my 'no makeup makeup' days #everysingleweekend, this gives me just the right amount of color there, too.

VOLUMIZING & LENGTHENING MASCARA 

Beautycounter recently launched two new mascara formulas and I love them both, equally. And I use both equally every single day. The Volumizing formula gives my lashes great fullness at the roots, giving them a nice and fluffy look. The Lengthening formula is perfect for adding that extra length to the ends, and gives the perfect application to the bottom lashes so you don't look like Tammy Faye. I was surprised that 'safe' mascara impressed me. I love to pile on the mascara but I always hated that it transferred to under my eyes by the afternoon. Not to mention, the removal process killed. 

There you have it, my top 5(ish) favorites from Beautycounter. You can shop the links here in this post, and you can of course ask me any questions in the comment fields below. 

I know there are a lot of safer product options out there. What are your favorites? #addict #betterbeautyjunkie

Dear Summer - And just like that, you're 4.

Oh Summer, four years old?! I can't even begin to tell you how crazy it is for me to think about how quickly 1,500 + days have gone by and how much you've changed all of us for the better. I've been thinking a lot about what you and I have to look forward to together. The gratitude I feel having a daughter is hard to really put into words. You are absolutely everything I always wanted, and still you bring an element of surprise and delight into each and every day. 

The things that make you pure magic truly are endless. My most favorite things about you right now have a lot to do with your sense of humor, how affectionate you are, your confidence, your EQ, and your coordination. I used to tell Daddy when you were in my belly that you were most definitely going to have some of the traits I always wished I had. Let's just say, your blonde hair, olive skin, and athleticism did not come from me. Your confidence, your wit, and your EQ absolutely did. You are enough like me, and enough opposite that I see us complimenting each other more and more as you grow up. When we went to Hawaii a few weeks ago, I couldn't help but obsess over how perfectly suited you are for island life, and what I wouldn't have given to pull off all of your swim suits like you did.

You are such a little mama. You love playing babies with Wyatt, and school, and really anything that requires laying your babies and stuffies all over our upstairs. Each of them always perfectly prepared with blankies for nap time. You are very intuitive and affectionate. Earlier this summer, I fell at Auntie's house, on the stairs, and it hurt so bad. #embarrassing You knew it hurt me, and you could not have been more adorable. Your sweetness distracted me from the pain and you quickly came to my aide. Earlier this year, we watched your birth slide show, and you got emotional watching it with me - even before I did. I looked down at you when we got to the picture when I was pushing and you looked up at me with these giant tears on the cusp of your little tear ducts. "I hurt you, Mommy?" My heart just about exploded. I was surprised you caught on. Your tears were contagious. For as confident and strong-willed as you are, you're damn sensitive. You are going to do something pretty great with this life of yours. I feel it in my bones. You have a light, honey. And I will make it my job to ensure it never ever dims. I am committed to ensuring it just gets brighter and brighter and brighter. We're all so lucky to be near you. 

As for some other things you're up to these days - you are a swimmer now, you have become a lot more patient with me to do your hair, and you continue to do most things on your own. You get dressed, you wipe your own butt (eh hem, Wyatt?), you make your bed, you get your own water, snacks, and you know how to turn Netflix on. Get it, girl. Sleeping in past 6AM is getting... better, I think. You'll have to ask Daddy because I have finally learned how to sleep through your wake up calls. #onlytook4years #tablesturneddaddy

You are such a great little sister. You and Wyatt are incredibly close. A lot of that has to do with how patient you are, and how eager you are to learn from him. You're a little competitive for his liking, but I love watching you keep him on his toes. We decided to stick you in Pre-K this year, just as Wyatt started Kindergarten. We became super excited about keeping you both close in grades - a year apart means you'll always watch out for each other. 

I have to insert this story really fast. About 15 minutes ago, Wyatt wasn't very nice to you. I sent him to his room and told him he could come back out in 5 minutes as long as he was ready to say sorry to you. He popped down after just about 5 minutes, said he was sorry and walked over to me. I hugged him and told him I was proud of him for doing exactly what I asked him to do. His response? "I came back down and said I was sorry to Summer because I have to go poop." #normalday About 2 minutes ago you asked him to help you make something on your white board. He did, then he encouraged you to try yourself. When you put your work down, Wyatt immediately came to it's defense. "Summer, it's a really good fishy." You root each other on, and it's in these moments, the ones where you think we aren't watching, that we know we're doing something right.

We love watching you learn new things, and continue to find your voice. And build on your confidence. You constantly make us smile, and laugh. Oh, the laughter that's in this house because of you. I think the best quality about you is that you never, ever, ever, take yourself too seriously. You always find it in yourself to laugh and be silly. Nothing beats sharing in something funny with you. It is the absolute best getting the giggles with you. Happy 4th Year my sweet, giant-hearted, strong, smart, inclusive, competitive, feisty girl. Please never stop giving us a run for our money, and inspiring me to be my best so you'll do the same.

Love Always,

Mama

LATELY

Littlest loves of my life - It's been awhile, but the truth is so much has stayed the same since I last wrote to you both. You're both still loving life at your Montessori school, we still love our house/not so love our neighborhood, and you both are continuing to entertain us with the paradox of sibling-hood. This paradox is represented by the following:

• loving each other / hating each other 
• being best friends / being enemies 
• wanting to be completely hooked at the hip / wanting nothing to do with the other 
• missing each other / hurting each other 

... and most importantly, always ultimately loving each other.

It's so funny watching you guys together -- you're so incredibly different. You always spend more time on the positive side of the paradox spectrum, might I add. The hating each other lasts one of two seconds because separating you two is worse for you both. The days you spend apart, you eat up the evenings catching up on play time. Watching you two reunite after even just an hour or two apart is the best ever. Wyatt, you can't find your words fast enough through the excitement of sharing whatever you believed to be the highlight of your day that summer would appreciate the most. Whatever you both do without the other, you're always thinking about each other. When Wyatt and I are out and about during your nap, Summer - he is ALWAYS thinking about you and talking about you. Always wanting to get you something since you aren't there. Always considering you. Summer, you do the same thing. Always asking what Wyatt's doing when he isn't with us, always including him in our conversation, and wanting to bring him something when we get home.

You both love playing school together upstairs. You color together, play babies together, talk on walkie talkies, watch movies, dance and sing together. You're both obsessed with white boards. And you are currently loving Trolls and the Secret Life of Pets. You watch Peppa every morning, sometimes Daniel Tiger. Wyatt, you sleep later than Summer STILL - typically coming into our room first, and either crawling in our bed for a show or scaring me when you creep up on me after getting out of the shower. Summer, you're up in the 5s most days - always going to your daddy's side first. LOVE YOU for that. The first thing you say is either -- "Da-eeeeee, awfee." or "Da-eeee, shows." It's always two words, even though you speak in complete sentences. You whisper now, but still walk like you have clogs on your feet in the morning. Heel, toe, heel, toe, heel toe.

Summer - your hair is either a complete mess, or perfectly braided. There's no in between. You are obsessed with your bunny puppet. You love hugging and kissing, and singing and cuddling. You are equally in love with Daddy and I -- finally, I moved up on your list! You say 'I love you' randomly. You compliment people at random times. "I love your face. I like your bag." or "I like your eyebrows and ears." You often call out that you and I are similar. even this morning, you said "I love you Mommy. We both have gy-nas." Dead.

Wyatt - you yourself can be a walking contradiction. strong willed and persistent, sensitive and vulnerable. You are starting to really enjoy being read to, especially Jack and Annie chapter books. That is our thing every night -- the best reward is to be read to before bed, and the biggest consequence is when I take it away for not listening or talking back. Yah, you are definitely 5 going on 15 sometimes. The talking back is super fun.

You both enjoy swimming and being outside. Winter months are hard on you for this reason, but thankfully your school still takes you outside rain or shine twice a day - because lord knows, I do not. Daddy is the go to adventure guy on the weekends -- always taking you both somewhere Saturday mornings usually. Donuts, coffee, Grammy and Papa's. I am the 1:1 parent - you can count on me for a trip to Target or Costco "just us".

One of your favorite things ever is when Gramma spends the night when Daddy and I bolt out of here for a date night away. She lets you do just about anything as long as you don't fight, whine, or cry. You build massive forts in the living room, watch movies and stay up late, and who knows what else. You are lucky kids -- you have so many people that want to spend time with you. They actually choose to do that over other things. Gramma preferred to ring in the new year with you two crazies instead of go out on the town. See? That much.

We love you both so dang much. I try every day to be the best I can for you - and you continue to do the same. We hate disappointing each other. Every day is a new day, and each day we get better and better at accepting all of the parts of the day, even the shitty ones, as the best parts. You make us so proud to be your parents.

Love, love, love you more.

Your Mama